Bummer

Reasons I’m bummed out right now:

• This is almost assuredly the biggest factor (well besides the last bullet point): I’m on the first day of my period, and I think I have PMDD because wowzers do my period do a number on me, mentally and emotionally.
• My only good friend at work is leaving to teach at a high school next year, right when I would have actually been able to have lunch with her again (it looks like I won’t be traveling between campuses anymore – crossing my fingers).
• (I will also admit to having thoughts along the line of, “She applied for one high school job and got it. I applied for four and didn’t get any of them. I really must suck.”)
• The shitty thing that I mentioned before that is causing so much stress (and I still don’t have the energy to write about – don’t worry, no one is sick or injured).
• My daughter’s school (soon to be my son’s school) is still the hot mess it was when we first started there (and they promised to make ALL THE CHANGES!). It makes me feel sad and hopeless seeing how broken the public school system is and how poorly it serves the students who need it most.
• It’s my kids’ spring break, but not mine. Most of their friends are off traveling (New York! Tahoe! Mexico! Southern California!) but we’re not (logistically difficult when we’re off on different weeks) and I’m having a bit of a pity party about it.
• Related to the above: I’m in the midst of accepting that we won’t be traveling internationally this summer, no matter what our tax return situation may be, and I’m bummed out about it.
• If we want to make those international trips a reality we will have to drastically change our priorities and I don’t see us actually doing that, especially when they are really only important to me.
• If we can’t even make those trips a priority, I highly doubt we’ll make living abroad a priority. It’s hard when you have vastly different goals than your spouse (and those goals are logistically complicated, financially challenging, and totally upend your life for a period of time).
• And this is a really big one: I read an article in Politico that Trump is almost sure to win in 2020 barring some drastic economic downturn or devastating scandal. This isn’t opinion, it’s prediction based on economic and historic trends. I doubt the economy will tank enough to ensure he isn’t re-elected, and it seems like there is no scandal big enough to take him down (I doubted the Mueller report was going to provide that scandal, but it’s disappointing to learn that it definitely will not). The thought of this political climate remaining a reality until 2024 sends me into a spiral of panic and depression.

So yeah. My emotional well being is the gutter right now, and it’s hard to keep my chin up.

What are you doing to stay positive these days?