The new normal

I’m still trying to figure out our new normal. It feels like all the adults have left the room, and they’re just throwing us bits and pieces of information that we need to interpret ourselves, instead of providing actual guidance. It’s disheartening. And frustrating.

I’m so curious to see what the messaging is from school – any school! – about all of this. It would be one thing if we had been back full time in the spring, like so many students and teachers were at the end of last year, but we weren’t. So now we’re going back full time, at full capacity, when students are way more likely to get sick, and I’m just dying to hear how they are framing it. So far, 1.5 weeks before SFUSD starts and two weeks before my district starts and it’s crickets.

So far the few sparse communications I’ve received (one as a staff member from our new superintendent and one from my daughter’s middle school) have doubled down on the promise to return full time in person (yay!) and reiterated the importance of students being back in school (also yay!). There has been NO MENTION of Delta or how much harder it will be to stifle the spread of this virus, even with mandatory masking. I’m so curious to hear what protocols will be used when a student tests positive, if entire classes will be put into quarantine or if they will just treat it as any other illness, with only the student staying home sick. Will the protocol be different if the student is vaccinated (at the middle school level all students in the 7th and 8th grade should be eligible (age wise) for vaccination). Inquiring minds want to know! And admins don’t want to open cans of worms before it’s absolutely necessary.

{My friend who is a teacher in a super small, but affluent district in the East Bay, said there would be no Covid-19 protocols except mask wearing at her school. No social distancing, no testing, and no quarantining of kids who were in direct contact with a student who tests positive. It’s basically business as usually but with masks on.}

I seem to be way more stressed out about everything than my friends are, and I’m realizing that moving forward, the pod we’ve been participating in might leave us behind to socialize in ways we no longer feel comfortable with. I don’t see us allowing indoor play dates or sleep overs once school starts (besides the 10 days at the KOA, we never actually did this), but I think I’m the only one who won’t be allowing that kind of socializing in our pandemic pod of four. The other families assume it’s only a matter of time before their kids get Covid and aren’t really interested in taking certain steps to stop that from happening anymore. It’s not like they have no boundaries, their boundaries are just different than ours are now, which means we won’t be able to participate in the pod anymore. At least not like we used to. That makes me really sad, but I don’t see myself being comfortable with my daughter being inside without a mask when her friends are going to different schools and mingling with dozens of different students. There is already so much risk of her getting sick from her own school, and at the very least I want to avoid the major disruption that a positive Covid test would mean for all of us.

I can’t believe this is happening – that after 17 months we’re being left behind by our pandemic pod because this thing is still not over, and our risk aversion no longer matches our peers. It’s surreal. And depressing. But there is nothing we can do but make the choices we feel comfortable with, and host in ways we feel comfortable with when that is possible.

At least the craziness of the current situation will help me not over-schedule. My son is signed up for soccer (outside) at his new school and will continue with Martial Arts (inside) and that already feels like WAY too much. I would pull him from MA for a while, but he’s been in the camp all summer and is now highly motivated to continue with a group of kids who are trying for their junior black belts. Since he’s relatively old (only has two more years before he’s in the “teen class” (at only 10! Why?!) pulling him for even six months would ruin his chances. So I don’t want to take that possibility from him, at least not while he’s so self-motivated. This is the first time a goal has been his idea, and I’m not ready to snatch that away. But with just those two activities he has three commitments a week! Luckily my daughter doesn’t want ANY commitments right now, she’s stressed enough about the start of middle school, and I am happy to oblige her until she’s vaccinated.

My mom came to school on Tuesday and helped me move my stuff to my new room. With her taking an extra wagon-full every time I made the trip we finished the vast majority of the move in one day. I couldn’t believe it. She saved me so much time! Unfortunately I can’t do too much with that extra time because the staff room is still, well a staff room full of staff room stuff. Yesterday I moved the rest of my junk and spent a fair amount of time just trying to figure out how to best configure the room. Today I plan to move enough staff room stuff around so that I can set up my desk (which I really struggled to place in the space – it’s weirdly configured for a classroom, because it wasn’t meant to be for teaching!)

There is so much I can’t control right now, so much I can’t even plan for yet. It makes things like my classroom, where I can tangibly control a small piece of my environment, feel that much more important.

Two weeks until students set foot on campus. Let the countdown begin.