I’m at a professional training today. I signed up, and paid for it myself. I’ll get no credit for it, and while I’m attempting to get out of a few 1.5 hour professional development meetings at my school with this, it’s just me doing it because I know there is always more to learn to become a better teacher.
But being here, I’m faced with my professional self-perception, which has taken quite a beating in the past few years, and which isn’t very positive right now. I have a lot feelings about myself as a foreign language teacher, and most of them are negative.
It sucks to feel like you aren’t very good at what you do.
I don’t know. I’m in a dark hole this week. I know a lot of us are. Maybe I feel so shitty about myself professionally because there are so many people in this country trying to make me feel shitty about myself personally, just for being a woman. It’s hard to build yourself up when everywhere around you people are tearing you down.
I’m having a hard time writing the letter to the school board and superintendent defending my program. I just can’t seem to find the words, and the deeper I dig the more I question myself and my choices.
It’s just a hard place to be. I know I’ll get out of it. And who knows, maybe being here will help me get out of it. I hope it does. I need to feel positively about something right now, and my job would be a good place to get started.
This sounds like “impostor syndrome” which I have suffered from sometimes. Sorry you are feeling that way. Yes, the current atmosphere sucks.
Put LOTS of words and sentences down on paper. Lots. Flow. Then several hours later remove at least 1/2. restructure into paper. Do you know a ‘word crafter’ who can then look it over and help with editing it? USe them. Take breaks between editions of letter.
Include: this is what is mandated/curiculuum guide about class. This is process I use. This is expected result. (Here is where Excitement and enjoyment of learning Spanish, knowledge of culture etc goes.) Complaintant was given THIS information prior to class about class purpose and placements in H.School. THIS is follow up with me of C’s work and grade. When and Why was feedback to parent about future placement voluntary for parent to request. What would your advice have been and why; were you informed about family’s requested placement. How many (%) of your students in that grade would you have said were ready for what family’s child did re placement. Remember to thank them for kind attention to this matter. HOPE AND TRUST YOU ARE TOTALLY IN TOUCH WITH UNION REP AND YOURS IS GOOD AND EXPERIENCED AT THEIR JOB!