Not a Wasted Word

May is officially in the rear view and now it’s time for June.

Unfortunately June is going to be crazy too! Hopefully it will be a more fun crazy. I have something big every weekend in June, and I’m glad I realized that early on so I can be ready for it.

I did not post every day in May. Not even close. But I did post way more than in April, and I’m glad I attempted to post every day if I meant I posted more often.

Oh, and I almost forgot to mention that Saturday ended up being a great day. We got home from the party at 1am and I realized I’d basically been out for 15 hours, but the baby shower was fine; the scuba class was not bad (the pool water was way warmer than I expected) and the party with my high school friends was super fun.

It helped that Sunday was a very lowkey day. The kids weren’t home for most of it, and I reveled in space that provided. We went out for lunch and then took our time walking home. It was nice.

I’m hoping June will be a lot like Saturday, crazy on paper but fun in practice. And Maybe July will be like Sunday, and let me catch my breath a little.

Part of why I feel DONE right now was that every day this week was marked by a pretty significant bummer. By the end of the week, I felt pretty run down.

Monday. I’m not quite sure what I did to mess it up again, but my shoulder was really hurting in the evening. I will admit that I haven’t put as much energy into rehabbing my shoulder because the first time I injured it, it eventually stopped hurting without any PT. This time I guess that is not going to be the case. It’s been since mid-January and it has bothered me more intensely and more consistently than my knee. It just really bummed me out to have it hurting so much again.

Tuesday. My physical therapist emailed me back with instructions on what to do when I got to 12 straight minutes of running and evidently it’s to… continue running for 12 minutes. And then, after doing that three times, and determining the average mileage I hit in that time, I can start upping that mileage by… 10-15%. I can probably run a little more than a mile in 12 minutes right now. Adding just 10-15% to that will be.. not very gratifying. I felt so deflated when I read that email. I haven’t run once this week because it feels like, what is the point? Getting all dressed in my running clothes only to run for 12 minutes kind of sucks. The thought of doing that for weeks and weeks just made me really sad.

Wednesday. I had 35 tamales to heat up on Wednesday and… the oven in my classroom didn’t work. I plugged it in and… nothing. I’m pretty sure the circuit breaker needed to be reset, but the janitor has been gone for weeks and sub didn’t have any idea where the circuit break might be. I was able to cobble together a solution (my sister’s old rice cooker/steam came in clutch yet again), but it was super stressful and the results were definitely not ideal. It was a really shitty situation.

Thursday. I forgot my glasses at home and had four 85-minute classes to teach and I couldn’t see anything and it was awful. To be clear, I did not actually forget my glasses, they just fell out of my bag somehow, and then someone else put their bag on the case so I didn’t see that they had fallen out. Thursdays are already bad days, but they are especially bad when I can’t see anything.

Friday. On Wednesday I had to move the Chromecart for the tamale party, and that required I turn it off before I unplugged it. When I moved it back, I plugged it in, but I didn’t turn it back on. So on Friday morning the chromebooks were out of juice by the end of 1st period and basically all my lesson plans for the day required them. I pivoted to a bingo game with 2nd period, while they charged a little (the cart charges each row of Chromebooks at a time, so they aren’t even all charging at once, which means it takes forever for them all to get even a little bit of electricity). Friday was another really stressful day, and I was running on pretty much zero by then.

So yeah, it wasn’t a great week. It was a pretty shitty week, actually. But there were some bright notes.

The 15yo did really well on her finals. She still hasn’t gotten her math score back, but she feels confident she didn’t bomb it. If that’s the case, she’ll end her sophomore year really strong.

My principal asked if I would be interested in teaching zero period again next year. And I would! I get to school right when zero period starts most days, so I’d only need to leave about 10 minutes earlier on a consistent basis to be there on time. And teaching zero period would mean I’d have another prep period during the day, which would mean that I wouldn’t have to teach four 85 minute classes on Thursdays! Sure, I’d be teaching a 55 minute class and three 85 minute classes, but I’d also have an 85 minute prep period on that day. I taught zero period once before and really liked it. I think it will be a good way to change things up next year, and I’m excited to do it.

My eyes are back to normal! And today is the last day of the antibiotic drops. I was so miserable with the double pink eye for so long, that I do not take un-crusty eyes for granted.

The husband has offered to clean the house for hosting on Friday. I tried three subs for next week and none of them were available, and I was kind of freaking out about having the house ready to host the grandparents for the 15yo’s birthday. My husband finally said he could take half a day on Friday and clean the house. Do I think he will clean it to my expectations? Absolutely not. But I’m going to set him up for success and then let him do what he can do. If that means the house does not look amazing when the grandparents come, that is fine with me. I’ll give him kudos for his efforts while everyone is here and they’ll know whose handiwork they are appreciating and I’m sure they’ll be impressed by whatever he manages because people have lower expectations of men when it comes to housework!

I’ve been dreading tomorrow for months and now it’s finally here and soon it will be over! I have to get my kids down to my parents’ house in time for a baby shower, then leave that early to get the 15yo to the scuba shop for our first pool class, and then leave that early (I can leave it early because I’m only renewing my license, which I got MANY years ago) to go to a party with a bunch of high school friends I haven’t seen since before the pandemic. I HATE having that many events overlapping, and I’m really only looking forward to the last one, but I’m worried I’ll be so tired by then I won’t enjoy it. Tomorrow really will be the perfect ending to an insane May, and I will be so relieved when it is over.

It’s almost June and I am hitting the wall. Hard.

This happens every year. I thought this year might be different, because a lot of obligations that were really stressful last year were less stressful this year, and over all I’ve felt less overwhelmed. But it seems it might not matter, and eventually, after the yearbook is finished, and Celebration of Learning is over, and the digital portfolios are ready to share, but I still have two weeks left of school and my daughter’s birthday to celebrate, and all the graduation events to participate in and attend, I will hit a wall and I will feel so incredibly over everything that just getting up in the morning makes me angry.

I’ve hit that place and I’m over it and I just want to wake up in two weeks when it’s all over.

My cat said it best in that photo up there. I feel you Serval. I really do.

It’s Monday night but it’s still the weekend! I’m so glad it’s a three day weekend. Only one of the last three weeks of school is five days long!

Meanwhile, it feels like most people are already done with their school years. The 15yo’s best friend was over and she is done, and we’re all sooooo jealous.

This weekend has not just been long, but spendy. The 15yo and I had to go get a bunch of scuba gear (mask, fins, gloves, booties) at the dive shop on Saturday and that all cost a pretty penny.

Today I took the 15yo and her friend to Dave & Busters (those cards I got two months ago still work!) and the 12yo and I ended up shopping the whole time. It started at Dick’s, where he needed new batting gloves and a batting helmet, and we threw in a pair of sunglasses, because why not!

Then we went to Uniqlo, which was having a decent sale (rare for them!) I grabbed some pants I’ve had my eye on forever, and a couple pair of shorts for the 15yo.

Finally we found a pair of Jordan 4s at Footlocker on pretty deep discount. They are a little too big, but he swears they feel fine and he’ll grow into them, probably faster than I expect. (I’ve been trying to replace his Jordans for months, so I was happy to make this purchase).

On Monday I did a little online shopping, getting the 12yo some jeans and the 15yo some sweatpants. It was definitely a spendy weekend!

But we did save some money too. The 12yo and I fixed the backboard of his basketball hoop on Sunday. It wasn’t like I was going to replace the basketball hoop, but at least now it probably won’t break all the way and become unusable (and he’s actually been out there shooting hoops a lot lately).

I cut the 15yo’s hair, which needed it BADLY. I cut everyone’s hair in my family, but the 15yo’s is the hardest because she wears it down and it’s relatively straight and she likes some layers in it. Cutting it myself definitely saves us around $80-100 a pop.

Also, we were going to ask the grandparents to get the 15yo a new phone for her birthday (hers is in rough shape), but then we realized we’ve been paying insurance on her phone (we worried she would lose it), so we filed a claim and they are replacing it. She’ll probably get a refurbished phone, but I’ll take that over spending almost a grand on a new one. Her current phone buzzes loudly when the haptics sound and it’s so annoying to be sitting anywhere near it when a group text she’s on is blowing up. I’m so excited for her to get a new one.

This also means the grandparents can give her a couple scuba diving trips in Maui for her birthday, which will save me money too! Woot!

I know I’ve been shit at posting every day, but at least I’m putting something up, which is more than I can say for April. It’s a busy time of year, and any posts that make it up are an accomplishment!

You all know how much I hate Thursdays. It’s the worst day. I have four 85-minute classes and no prep period. It’s just the longest slog and I’m so done by the end of it.

Today, after all that teaching and all that middle school madness, I had to stay at work until our “Celebration of Learning,” at 6pm, and talk to parents and students walking through my room for an hour.

Oh, and I have pink eye. In both eyes.

Talk about a really fucking bad day. It absolutely sucked.

Also I missed the 12yo’s concert tonight. He played trombone in the band and I missed it. Ugh.

Okay. Breathe. When I started this post it was 8:40 and I hadn’t eaten dinner. Now it’s almost 9pm and I have some food in my stomach and the hangry is subsiding. My eyes still feel like they’re sitting in sand, but the rest of me feels more human.

Tomorrow we have a minimum day, a great start to a three day weekend. Maybe, by Monday afternoon, I’ll actually feel good again.

We ordered the yearbook this morning. I can’t believe it’s finally done! Actually I can, because it wasn’t a sprint to the finish line this year. In fact, it wasn’t all that stressful at all.

Still, I’m really glad it’s over and I can turn my attention to other things.

This Thursday is my school’s “Celebration of Learning” (FKA Open House). My classroom has been a disaster area for months and I’ve been slowly excavating it from under the rubble. It’s definitely going to take many more hours for it to be presentable to parents.

Once Celebration of Learning is behind me, the biggest single work event is the Tamale y Mole party I throw for the kids who went above and beyond, completing all the possible comprehensible input options. This year there are only 40 kids invited, which is 15 less than last year, which means it will be easier to pull off.

But work isn’t the only thing that’s busy. The 15yo and I have PADI trainings to complete before our weekend in the pool. On the 30th I have a good friend’s baby shower, my pool training, and then a party with a bunch of high school friends, some of whom I haven’t seen since before the pandemic. I am dreading that day, but looking forward to two of the events.

May has been really busy. The first half of June will be busy too. I keep reminding myself that in four weeks I’ll be on summer break. When that happens I’ll finally be able to breath.

I finally went back to PT this week. It had been five weeks since my last appointment (he was sick and we had to reschedule) and I was itching to go in because he promised that I’d go on the treadmill to check my gait and then he’s start me on a program to return to running.

I will be running for a total of 12 minutes at a time over the next two weeks. Friday it was six 2-minute intervals with a minute of walking between each run. Next it will be four 3-minute intervals with the same minute of walking in between, then three 4-minute intervals and so on. I think ultimately I do 8 minutes then 4 minutes before running for a straight 12 minutes, at which point – if my knee seems fine – I will email for the next steps (which are distance based, not time based).

On Friday I went to one of my favorite spots and ran for the first time in five months. It was a beautiful day and it felt so good to be running. My knee has felt okay since the first run. We shall see if it continues to hold up.

(I wrote this post on Saturday but then forgot to publish it. I also forgot to write it on Friday when I meant to. I’m not hitting my photo post every day in May goal but that’s okay. At least I’m getting something up most days.}

I’m writing on my blog from my computer! I haven’t done that in over a month! This is big news!

I’m also on the elliptical! I’ve missed writing blogs on the elliptical!

What did I do to fix it? Absolutely nothing. I have no idea why it wasn’t working before and I have less idea why it is working now. I’m just going to embrace that it’s working for the time being!

On thing I hope to figure out now that I’m back on my browser, is why I have been required to manually turn on comments for every post. I just went into setting and it seems I should NOT have to be doing that. Hmmm. Not all the problems are solved. Shocking…

Still, I’ll take what I can get!

There is a lot going on right now. I’m definitely starting to hit a wall. But! I feel like I am, overall, handling the stress relatively well. I’m doing WAY better than I was at this time last year. Of course this time last year I was getting ready to test for my red belt! How did I survive that and finishing the yearbook? I truly do not know.

One thing that I think is helping is getting at least six hours of sleep most nights. Even when I go to bed “late” it’s never after midnight. This feels like a big step in the right direction! And yes, it’s not perfect (ideally I’d want to be asleep by 11pm every night), but I refuse to let perfect be the enemy of good.

Speaking of which, I need to head to bed. It’s almost 11:45pm, which is the latest I’ve been up in a while!

Yesterday I did not manage to workout. I didn’t feel great about it, and in an attempt to quell my disappointment I pulled up the Peloton app to choose my Wednesday workout. I really wanted something long and hard, and even wished there were a new Sims 60 I could take, when lo and behold, that is exactly what I found at the top of the app. It had just been released that day! It was like someone left that workout just for me.

Today I got home from PT (more on that tomorrow), changed into my workout clothes and got my ass thoroughly handed to me by that Sims 60 workout. It was just what I needed.

Serval is a very distinguished gentleman, especially when he’s perched on the top of our couch.

I would apologize for two cat photos in a row, but I love cat photos so I won’t. Also, today was a crazy day and I’m exhausted and it’s almost 11pm and I’m going to bed.