The murky middle

After four solid days of decompression, I find myself prepared to start doing shit again. I’m glad I let myself take that time. I needed it so much that I wasn’t stressed out by how gross the house looked. It was like I didn’t even see it.

Now, I’m seeing it. And I’m ready to do something about it.

To be fair, I started a couple days ago, just quietly moving things back to their general areas. It was never a concerted effort, just I’m going downstairs anyway, so I’ll bring these towels that have been sitting in a laundry bag for three days. It was nice to feel casual about it, and honestly I think maybe I needed things to get to a better place before I could feel capable of tackling it all. It’s a relief to know that sometimes these things can happen organically. I suppose that was possible because I knew I had two weeks before our final trip of the summer.

I started packing my daughter for away camp that way too. Where did I put those pants of hers I borrowed for the KOA? Here they are, I will just plop them down by her desk for when we start packing. Before I knew it, I had refilled all her toiletry bottles and lined them up on the window sill of the bathroom. Now most of the “not her normal every day clothes” stuff has been added to the pile by her desk, so all she needs to do is choose what she wants to wear there.

After four weeks of not letting work enter my mind, I’m starting to think about that again too. On Monday my son starts a camp on my campus and I plan to spend the day in my classroom so I don’t have to drive all the way back home and then down again. Knowing I’m going to be there again soon is prompting my to think of how I can help future me out by getting stuff done now. Next year I will have TWO 1B classes for the first time in my 20 year teaching career next year, which means some stuff will have to be done differently. I want to start preparing for that this summer, while I have the time and energy.

I ended up getting quite a few things during Prime Day. I don’t usually find much that I want or need on sale, but this year I did. Some things I grabbed:

• two Speedo swimsuits for my daughter (at only <$20 a pop!!)
• two 3-packs of boys joggers that I hope will be long enough to fall to my son’s ankles but also small enough to not fall off his hips
• a 6-pack of socks for my son (where did all his socks go?!)
• USB to lightening cords (ours are starting to work only sporadically)
• a oscillating circular saw for $30 (we may be getting a free refrigerator from a friend that requires I cut 3/4″ out of our cabinet)
• a new, larger weighted blanket for our son (his old one is too short now) for <$20
• a zip up hoodie for myself (my old one has been missing for long enough that I assume it’s lost)
• two “police” shirts for skits at school (I’ve had them in my “saved for later” for over a year and this is the only time they’ve ever gone on sale)
• a new weekly task planner (mine will be out when school starts again).

The best thing though is something I got before Prime Day (it didn’t go on sale anyway) was this insane pair of Crocs for my son, who grew out of his old pair this summer.

It turns out, if you go to the Crocs page on Amazon and just keep scrolling, you’ll eventually come across their Crocs x Pringles collab and, if you’re me, lose your GD mind.

He LOVES them and I love them and since he’s now only one size smaller than me, I can wear them at least every once in a while (Crocs are big enough that I can wear a size smaller). These arrived on my birthday and even though they weren’t for me, they made me so happy. The mustache backs!!!

I meant to write more but the day for away from me. My parents took me to a belated birthday lunch at Mission Chinese to get my favorite dish (thrice cooked bacon with rice cakes) and then my daughter and I finished 3 Body Problem. My husband and I walked up to our son’s camp to see the skit presentations and then we all walked back. Our daughter has a friend spending the night so we let our son play video games and it felt like a Friday. I keep having to remind myself that he still has camp tomorrow.

I need to pick up the pace on tackling my to-do list. My husband’s birthday is on Sunday and our daughter is leaving for away camp. It feels simultaneously like here is a lot going on and not much at all. I’m struggling to get my bearings. I’m trying to be patient with myself.

This is the murky middle of summer. It’s a weird place to be.