Together

I know I previously said I wasn’t going to mention some of our summer plans, but you know what? F*ck it. If people want to judge me, and tell me how horrible my choices are they can, because we took our kids on planes to see our family and you know what? For us, the risk was worth it.

There were plenty of times I almost bailed out of these travel plans. When Southwest cancelled our direct flight from SFO to STL and had us spending 4 hours in Kansas City… When I saw how crazy the Covid numbers were in Missouri… When I just felt panicked about getting on a plane…

But we were able to change our reservations to fly direct out of Oakland, and the numbers in St. Louis were much better than other parts of the state, and I made the 2019 photo book a couple weeks before we left which made it easier for me to talk myself down from the plane dread (because I reminded of how much I miss my family and how much fun we all have at the farm).

Our stay was shorter (10 days instead of 14) and we made sure all our activities were outside (and the weather cooperated with mid 80s to low 90s degree days). We never took the kids inside in a public space (except the Art Museum on my husband’s last morning – and there was almost no one there). We did hit up the zoo and various swimming pools. All the adult relatives we saw (including the 15 adults at the farm) were fully vaccinated (none of the children qualified for vaccinations). It was a different trip in a lot of ways, but it felt very familiar.

The farm was amazing. My sister (who lives in England) and my cousin (who lives in South Carolina) were not there, but everyone else was. We cooked together. We ate together. We swam together. We played together. We walked the creek together. We looked at fish in the quarry together. We sang karaoke together. We danced together. We marveled at fireworks together. We remembered together. We just were, together.

And it was amazing.

I know my kids will likely be vaccinated this fall, at which point the pandemic, for our family, will pretty much be over (at least it will be here in the Bay Area, where our vaccination rates are so high – yes I recognize our incredible privilege). But this trip only happens July 4th, and we didn’t think the risks warranted missing it. I know many families are making similar choices. I also know that many families would have let everyone else gather while they stayed at home, and I absolutely respect that decision. I hope those people can respect mine.

Heaven is a quarry lake about 90 minutes outside St. Louis.

5 Comments

  1. Sounds great! So glad you went! Most people I know are traveling this summer. I would take my 7 year old on a plane because he can reliably wear a mask but not my 3 year old. I don’t think you were being reckless at all! The pandemic is still raging but it is unvaccinated people who are getting sick. You were around fully vaccinated people, mostly outside, and your kids wore masks on the plane and in the airport. Sorry you feel judged! The truth is that among people who are vaccinated, the world is really different than it was six months ago!

  2. SO glad you went. Very needed and important to see family. And your timing was impeccable as rates are only now beginning to really jump again among the un-vaccinated and I know you two adults and your kids use masks correctly.
    Glad you avoided the long layover too!
    Hope your stress came down being among family for those days! Makes such a difference. We are all very much in need of this sort of time.
    CONGRATULATIONS and welcome back as well.

  3. FWIW, I didn’t feel any surprise / judgement that you would take this trip — sounds like a well thought out choice with many precautions taken. Glad you were able to get away and see your family!

  4. We have flown once during the pandemic, like you to visit far away family. My kids are really good at wearing masks and we felt fine. I am extremely pro adult vaccination but do not feel confident enough that one will be approved for my kids ages any time soon to wait for that. Very different risk profile for me. I am still avoiding big gatherings of people who may not be masked since I also live in a very high vaccinated area I am trying to enjoy the summer as much as possible before any fall surges. It’s hard to know when this thing is ever going to be really over

  5. So glad you got to spend that time with your family! We just flew back from MN (spent the last 5 days there at my cousin’s wedding and then hanging out at my parents’ farm in the pool with my siblings and their kids). Such a great break for all of us! I actually fly to San Diego this Friday because my sis will be 39w pregnant and her husband will be on the east coast for work for 10 days. That means she’s home alone with a 3 year old and almost 2 year old and could go into labor at any point, so I’m hanging with her and the kids to help her out (and hopefully be her support during birth!). Plane travel has definitely resumed for nearly everyone I know. Vaccine rates hit 70% in Colorado (and in my area of the state), so it feels pretty darn pre-pandemic around here, which I’m very grateful for.

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