Not a panacea (on re-adjusting expectations)

I had high hopes for my chiropractic appointment. My lower back has been killing me and my hips have felt very uneven. I was sure an adjustment (which I haven’t had in well over a year) would set me straight. And she did have plenty to adjust and it did feel great to feel parts of me slide back into place, but my back still hurt in the car on the way to work, and my hips aren’t anywhere near “normal” yet.

It turns out one chiropractic adjustment is not a panacea.

Which of course I know, and yet my disappointment on Tuesday suggests I didn’t really know. I was hoping, nay EXPECTING that once I forked over $110, my aches and pains would be over.

I’m glad that appointment was on Monday and that I’ve had several days to readjustment my expectations around my knee appointment and, more importantly, my day off.

The reality is, she probably isn’t going to say much at my knee appointment. Honestly. I’m kind of wondering why we’re having it. I do have some questions, but I feel like they could be answered over email. I don’t really feel like her tugging on me knee does much (she always says it feels good) and absent another MRI (which I’d rather avoid) it feels like the only way to move forward is by following established guidelines and trying stuff out when those guidelines say it’s safe (ie going for a short run and seeing how my knee feels afterward).

I guess the good news is that my knee does give me feedback when I try to bend it (negative feedback, it does not want to bend!) so I feel confident that once I can start working on that, I actually will know if I’m doing too much. But she’s not going to tell me I can run when I want to, or return to sparring when I want to return to sparring, and she’s not going to tell me anything else about my knee I don’t already know. I will be sure to ask what exactly we’re hoping to achieve when we schedule the next appointment. (I made this one assuming that if I tweaked my knee is any way during the test, I could ask her about that. So I’m partly glad this appointment feels unnecessary).

{If you have any suggestions for questions to ask at this appointment, please mention them in the comments! I’ve never had an injury like this, so I’m not really sure what I’m doing, and I’m sure I’m missing opportunities left and right.}

As for my day off on Friday, countless days off that did not provide the respite I needed have conditioned me to be more realistic with that one, but I could already feel myself reaching for Friday as the answer to my stress and it will not provide that. I get to see my son’s music class perform and I will have time to get the downstairs ready to host Book Club on Friday afternoon. I think besides that I should pick one thing I want to do that day, just for me, and luxuriate in that 2ish hours. Right now I’m assuming it will be a movie and popcorn, but I may splurge on a massage. Even just a 30 minutes stretch class with a roller would feel amazing if I could do it alone in my living room without feeling guilty for not being available to other people.

A realistic treat that I have identified as my “me time” will help make that day feel special, even if I clean up and grade papers before and after that treat.

{If anyone can recommend a good movie that is streaming now, I have most mainstream services except Amazon Prime Video.}

It’s common for my expectations to require readjustment, and that is especially true when I’m really overwhelmed and stressed. The reality is, nothing is going to alleviate the feeling of overwhelm in May, except identifying my priorities, making time to tackle the most pressing tasks, and finding ways to make tackling them more enjoyable (a bingeable show or audio book I’m about to finish two) would be great – again suggestions are welcome!) I know I can accomplish everything if I just keep plugging away at what I need to do. Eventually it will be mid-June…

3 Comments

  1. I think a massage will help your back way more than a movie! I hope you enjoy your day off tomorrow.

  2. Bingeworthy book – 5 Star Weekend or Hotel Nantucket by Elin Hilderbrand. (If you like beachy books with class wars stuff and not too much suspense!)

    As for deciding whether to go o the appt vs asking a question – from a provider perspective – if you think your questions (probably no more than 2) could be answered quickly and would not require a back and forth (follow up questions) then I say try just messaging instead! However, if it’s any more than that, would recommend going to the visit. There are a few exceptions but in general providers don’t get reimbursed for patent messages so if it’s long / involved or going to be a back and forth many times my method is to ask patients to please schedule at least a telehealth appt. (PS – telehealth could be good in between option if they offer that and you really don’t think you need an exam, though part of me feels like with an injury the exam portion is important!!)

  3. Sounds like you are going into Friday with highly realistic expectations. Takes a lot of maturity to achieve that. SO HARD to not expect magic and miracles when they are so desirable AND to also set realistic goals so things do get accomplished. Massage sounds desirable to me but depends on knowing and having an appointment with someone who really is good and who knows your body, in my experience. A ‘smear-er of oil’ massage is not worth the time or money.
    Very best wishes and hopes that this weekend as a whole lets you move a lot of stress out of the ‘to do’ pile and into ‘done’. For me too….. and for all of us!

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.