Recognition

The principal at my school sends out a weekly email to the staff every Monday morning with a list of everything that will be happening during the week. At the bottom of the list there is a shout-outs section where she thanks different staff members for going above and beyond the week before, with a sentence or two about what they did.

I never make it on the shout outs section. Never. Even when I did the professional development that everyone seemed to appreciate. I doubt I’ll ever get onto the shout outs section. I’m sure there are other teachers who don’t make it onto the shout out section either. I think it’s good to recognize people in those ways, but it’s also a way to make those who never make the cut very aware that they, well, never make the cut.

I was thinking the other day about how proud I am of the work I’m doing in my Spanish classrooms this year. I’m a pretty damn good teacher of middle school Spanish, and the way I teach requires a lot of patience, energy, enthusiasm and dedication. Most language teachers don’t teach this way because it requires the instructor to be more vulnerable, to trust the students more, to follow their lead and help them produce characters and stories in the language that engage them. I’m really proud of the way I teach, and I think what I’m doing in my classroom is pretty awesome.

I’m also aware that I will likely never be recognized for any of it.

No public school teacher goes into it for the glory. We don’t do it for the money or the respect. Society generally doesn’t regard us very highly – we make far less than other professionals with similar amounts of schooling. Many people believe that they can do our jobs as well as, if not better, than we can (we were all students once, right? We all know what teaching entails!) And of course the famous refrain: those who can’t do, teach. I mean that, right there, says it all.

So yeah, I didn’t become a public school teacher for the recognition. And yet? It’s hard to reconcile my efforts with the appreciation I’m given. Middle schoolers aren’t exactly the most empathetic, aware subset of humans. It’s hard to find a group that is less self-centered, actually, and that is saying something of the only species on Earth that can navel gaze.

I suppose most people go through life not feeling very appreciated by their colleagues, or in their profession. The world is full of people going above and beyond without anyone recognizing their efforts or accomplishments. And I will do the same. But I wonder if this age of social media has made that lack of recognition all the more glaring, because we get to see all the people that ARE recognized for what they do. Some are paid millions of dollars for doing the same thing as everyone else, but with filters and sponsors and paid-for posts. I mean, if someone can be famous just for playing Fortnite, surely I can expect a little recognition for my efforts in the classroom.

Or maybe everyone has always felt like this, and it’s just part are of the human condition.

I used to think I wanted to create something that would outlast me – some piece of media that would carry my name and efforts farther than I could otherwise reach. I have jettisoned that desire – I know it will only cause me frustration and grief – but I suppose a small remnant of it remains. I will probably work in my district for my entire adult life and when I retire no one will care because all the people I originally worked with will be gone and my students will be grown up and it just won’t matter to anyone that I’m not there anymore. It’s hard to accept that, but it’s also important that I do.