Not a Wasted Word

I’ve talked a lot about how, since our recent reorganization efforts, we’ve been able to keep the house tidy much longer than ever before. I think this is because I have been very pleasantly surprised to find some new solutions to old, persistent organizational problems recently. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve faced a problem and then just tackled it in the same way as always, only to find, after a while, that I’m failing at it again.

And maybe that does make sense, because some systems in my life serve me very well. My workout regimen generally works for me and I NEVER fall off the 4-5x a week workout regime I set myself. I don’t even have to think about it, it just happens (well I very much do have to think about it, I am always mentally taking note of when I’m going to work out and what I’ll do, but I don’t have to THINK about thinking about it, I just get it done.)

But the reality is that every big change I’ve made on the home front has required I try something radically different. The first big success was when we MarieKondo’ed the house. Taking all of everything in a category and going through it all at once was immensely helpful. We did that years ago and while the house always goes back to being messy and brimming with too much stuff, it’s never felt as hopeless as it did before that massive purge. That was definitely a turning point for us (and I still fold my clothes like she suggests!)

This time we didn’t do anything quite as drastic as a Marie Kondo purge, but we are tackling persistent problems in new ways, which makes me think maybe this time the affects will stick, or at least last longer.

The hallway closet is definitely one of those areas that I feel renewed hope about. Our house has very little built-in storage and one of the few closets is a very narrow space between the stairs and our daughter’s bedroom. Luckily the Billy basket shelves from IKEA fit in there, and I’ve repurposed some long, narrow boxes to better utilize the shelves, so we are able to use most of the space. But no matter how many times I’ve pulled it all out and reorganized it, it’s always ended up messy and it’s never been a space anyone else could really access. So if something was in there that someone else needed, I had to go find it.

Now, with the hanging door organizer, I can finally say, it’s in the closet; Look for the clear pouch that says “bandaids”. Because ALL THE POUCHES HAVE A LABEL! And even if what they want is in a drawer, now the drawers aren’t overflowing so they can see the extra toothpastes and the medicines. (The medicines actually got moved to the hall closet from the kitchen pantry, where they were DRIVING MY HUSBAND CRAZY for ten years. Just that simple move feels like a giant win.

But back to the labels. One of the things I purchased for this organizing attempt was a label maker. More than half of the professional organizers in Organized Living listed a label maker in their essential tool kit, and I found one on sale so I went for it. At first I used it quite sparringly, but then I realized that when I was forced to articulate what was in a box or drawer, I was much better at determining what should stay and what should go. Labeling also helps me return items to their spaces. And, in time, I hope it will help my family find what they need. So now I put labels on pretty much everything, even drawers that only I use and no one else really sees. The purpose is not so much to let other people know what is in a spot, but to remind myself.

There are more changes I want to make. I want to get a slat wall for the garage; the giant expanse at the back, where we pull the car in, has always felt under utilized and we have so many helmets and other bicycle accoutrements that could hang from one there. And guess I’m just newly inspired to think about different ways I can tackle old problems. I’m still at a loss in some spaces (laundry area in the garage – I’m looking at you!) but I finally feel hopeful that a different solution might be available if I keep looking (actually, I hung an accordion drying rack in the laundry area not too long ago and that was an absolute game changer).

These are some more the things I bought so we could tackle old problems in new ways. Most books about decluttering, including Organized Living (and Gill’s first book, Minimalista) urge you not to buy new storage containers, and at first I tried to follow that guidance. But when I despaired about reorganizing the tools or hall closet for the umpteenth time, I decided that trying something new was in order.

I will admit that I have been very extrinsically motivated to keep the house tidy this past month. I had so much on my plate without adding “re-organize everything you already worked on” to it. My desire to just keep moving forward, without needing to circle back, in my to-do lists was highly motivating. I was very good about completing tasks (not leaving items to put back later), and every time I walked through a room I identified stuff that didn’t belong and dealt with it immediately. Of course it is easy to identify items that need to be dealt with when the rest of the room is tidy, and it takes less time to put stuff away when I know where it goes.

I also found that I have been quicker to identify lingering issues and solve them, instead of just letting the problem persist. Little things like, I hate when my hair ties get tangles on them; I used to leave them all over and then finally gather up to cut the hair off a bunch at once, so I could put them into their little dish (a repurposed detergent measure). They were driving me crazy so I just got another little dish to keep the ones that needed attention until I was ready to give them that attention. Such a small fix, but I never thought to do it until now.

Maybe they had been the biggest change in mindset; the desire to keep everything neat has motivated me to just keep finding new ways to solve old problems. And having a tidy house as a baseline has helped me recognize which problems are persistent and need new solutions.

We left the house this morning ready for the cleaning person to come, and then our in-laws to stay. I have to say, it looks really nice. I have not felt so good about walking away from my house in a long while.

Thanks for taking this journey with me. I bet you’re all wondering what I’ll write about now that it’s over. 🤣 I definitely get fixated on a thing, that is for sure. At least this project has been, for the most part, a really positive one.

{Sorry if you get this twice. I had some posting issues (its original post date was January 12! When I started writing it.) I have never been a fan of the WordPress app, and today even less so. Boo.}

I’ve talked a lot about how, since our recent reorganization efforts, we’ve been able to keep the house tidy much longer than ever before. I think this is because I have been very pleasantly surprised to find some new solutions to old, persistent organizational problems recently. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve faced a problem and then just tackled it in the same way as always, only to find, after a while, that I’m failing at it again.

And maybe that does make sense, because some systems in my life serve me very well. My workout regimen generally works for me and I NEVER fall off the 4-5x a week workout regime I set myself. I don’t even have to think about it, it just happens (well I very much do have to think about it, I am always mentally taking note of when I’m going to work out and what I’ll do, but I don’t have to THINK about thinking about it, I just get it done.)

But the reality is that every big change I’ve made on the home front has required I try something radically different. The first big success was when we MarieKondo’ed the house. Taking all of everything in a category and going through it all at once was immensely helpful. We did that years ago and while the house always goes back to being messy and brimming with too much stuff, it’s never felt as hopeless as it did before that massive purge. That was definitely a turning point for us (and I still fold my clothes like she suggests!)

This time we didn’t do anything quite as drastic as a Marie Kondo purge, but we are tackling persistent problems in new ways, which makes me think maybe this time the affects will stick, or at least last longer.

The hallway closet is definitely one of those areas that I feel renewed hope about. Our house has very little built-in storage and one of the few closets is a very narrow space between the stairs and our daughter’s bedroom. Luckily the Billy basket shelves from IKEA fit in there, and I’ve repurposed some long, narrow boxes to better utilize the shelves, so we are able to use most of the space. But no matter how many times I’ve pulled it all out and reorganized it, it’s always ended up messy and it’s never been a space anyone else could really access. So if something was in there that someone else needed, I had to go find it.

Now, with the hanging door organizer, I can finally say, it’s in the closet; Look for the clear pouch that says “bandaids”. Because ALL THE POUCHES HAVE A LABEL! And even if what they want is in a drawer, now the drawers aren’t overflowing so they can see the extra toothpastes and the medicines. (The medicines actually got moved to the hall closet from the kitchen pantry, where they were DRIVING MY HUSBAND CRAZY for ten years. Just that simple move feels like a giant win.

But back to the labels. One of the things I purchased for this organizing attempt was a label maker. More than half of the professional organizers in Organized Living listed a label maker in their essential tool kit, and I found one on sale so I went for it. At first I used it quite sparringly, but then I realized that when I was forced to articulate what was in a box or drawer, I was much better at determining what should stay and what should go. Labeling also helps me return items to their spaces. And, in time, I hope it will help my family find what they need. So now I put labels on pretty much everything, even drawers that only I use and no one else really sees. The purpose is not so much to let other people know what is in a spot, but to remind myself.

There are more changes I want to make. I want to get a slat wall for the garage; the giant expanse at the back, where we pull the car in, has always felt under utilized and we have so many helmets and other bicycle accoutrements that could hang from one there. And guess I’m just newly inspired to think about different ways I can tackle old problems. I’m still at a loss in some spaces (laundry area in the garage – I’m looking at you!) but I finally feel hopeful that a different solution might be available if I keep looking (actually, I hung an accordion drying rack in the laundry area not too long ago and that was an absolute game changer).

These are some more the things I bought so we could tackle old problems in new ways. Most books about decluttering, including Organized Living (and Gill’s first book, Minimalista) urge you not to buy new storage containers, and at first I tried to follow that guidance. But when I despaired about reorganizing the tools or hall closet for the umpteenth time, I decided that trying something new was in order.

I will admit that I have been very extrinsically motivated to keep the house tidy this past month. I had so much on my plate without adding “re-organize everything you already worked on” to it. My desire to just keep moving forward, without needing to circle back, in my to-do lists was highly motivating. I was very good about completing tasks (not leaving items to put back later), and every time I walked through a room I identified stuff that didn’t belong and dealt with it immediately. Of course it is easy to identify items that need to be dealt with when the rest of the room is tidy, and it takes less time to put stuff away when I know where it goes.

I also found that I have been quicker to identify lingering issues and solve them, instead of just letting the problem persist. Little things like, I hate when my hair ties get tangles on them; I used to leave them all over and then finally gather up to cut the hair off a bunch at once, so I could put them into their little dish (a repurposed detergent measure). They were driving me crazy so I just got another little dish to keep the ones that needed attention until I was ready to give them that attention. Such a small fix, but I never thought to do it until now.

Maybe they had been the biggest change in mindset; the desire to keep everything neat has motivated me to just keep finding new ways to solve old problems. And having a tidy house as a baseline has helped me recognize which problems are persistent and need new solutions.

We left the house this morning ready for the cleaning person to come, and then our in-laws to stay. I have to say, it looks really nice. I have not felt so good about walking away from my house in a long while.

Thanks for taking this journey with me. I bet you’re all wondering what I’ll write about now that it’s over. 🤣 I definitely get fixated on a thing, that is for sure. At least this project has been, for the most part, a really positive one.

We don’t usually do anything for each other on Valentine’s Day, and we’re definitely not this year. We’re rain checking until our trip next week.

Which is fitting, because it’s quite a blustery day. So much rain this winter.

The good news is the weather in Mexico City is supposed to be beautiful next week. I haven’t been watching it too closely because our plans don’t require beautiful days, but I will happily enjoy them.

I’m certainly not sad to be missing out on this.

Meanwhile I keep trudging through my to-do lists. Clean the cat food mats. Clean the cat boxes. Do laundry and laundry and more laundry. Pack myself. Pack the kids. So many things to do and I am seriously losing steam. I think when I finally sit down on the plane I’m just going to a stare at the seat in front of me for a bit. Maybe the whole flight.

I’m actually pretty much packed now. I bought a few final toiletry items today and now I’m pretty much ready to go. It feels really good to be packed – it’s always stressful for me and this was exceptionally so because it’s such a different kind of trip. We’re going to nice restaurants and out for cocktails. I need to have “going out” clothes in my bag. I never have to pack going out clothes. Or at least I haven’t in probably a decade. So it’s nice to have it all in there, and to know it fits.

Last night I went to Sparring concepts and then stayed for Sparring afterward. It was one of those sparring sessions where I actually felt like I was getting better. It felt really good, and I hope I can hang on to that feeling after this trip and really dive back into my training. Tonight I’m going to High Belt class, which has never been a favorite. I know it won’t feel as good as sparring did but I hope I at least still feel like I’m making progress.

I promise to post about changes I’ve made to help me stay organized. I realized that I touted those changes as new systems when really they are new solutions to old problems. It’s not so much that I found different ways to stay organized on a daily basis, but that I created organized spaces that are easier for me to maintain. I just want to temper expectations, because the former would be amazing, but sadly I can only offer the latter.

I can’t believe I’m only at work one more day. As I expected, I’m not getting “all caught up” at work this week, but I am checking off a couple of festering to-do items, and I’ve made all the copies I need for the first few days of the week we get back (you may remember that I did NOT do that for the week after the Winter Break and I regretted it deeply). Tomorrow is my no-prep day so I plan to write my sub plans tonight. My good friend is taking my classes so I can just give her agenda slides to put up on the TV. That will help immensely.

Last night I slept very poorly. I was up every hour or so and I tossed and turned before falling back to sleep. I really hope tonight I get a decent amount of sleep, but I fear this is travel-stress-related and therefore here to stay. At least until I leave.

And my bus is about to arrive at the dojo, so I should stop and just put this up. I hope everyone felt loved this Valentine’s Day.

Last night I finished packing and when I texted my friends to tell them, they asked me what I was most looking forward to on my trip. And honestly, the only thing I could think was that I was looking forward to not having to do anything for five days, to just leave all my to-do lists behind. Of course, lately my to-do lists have been overflowing, as they would before any trip, but especially this one – the first one we’ve taken without our kids and the first where grandparents have had to stay them in our house (because the kids are in school). And of course, the state of our house required laundry lists of to-do lists over the past two months.

Keeping all that in mind, I am recognizing that lately my life feels like a series of to-do lists. And of course, to-do lists help me organize and prioritize my time and are important for me to keep from forgetting things. But if I’m not careful, I can lose myself in these lists. I can lose my life in these lists.

I remember during one break from school last year, I divided my goals into four areas (Home, Work, Self, Connection and seeing how short my lists were in “Self” and “Connection” helped me to prioritize self-care and time with friends and family. I believe I got a massage that week, and scheduled lunch with my husband and drinks with a friend so I could just write a couple things in those sections. Seeing how many tasks I had written in Home and Work and how few I had written in Self and Connection was a visual confirmation of how I was not prioritizing myself and my needs.

Coming out of these past two months of intensive work on the house, I think I need to go back to that four-pronged goal framework. I think doing it at a monthly level to start makes sense, and then eventually working toward weekly goals in each of the four areas. I have become very task oriented, and I have systems for writing those tasks for home and school that are working for me. I’m a kind of loathe to shake things up too much when I’ve found some executive functioning systems that make life manageable. But I also want to ensure I’m prioritizing my emotional and physical health and connections with others, the things that make life feel worth living.

So I think, starting in March, I’m going to write monthly goals in those four categories, and then I’ll try to also write them as weekly goals. If I can add one “self-care” and one “connections” task to my to-do list every week, that would be a big improvement. And then maybe, I can start adding more. I honestly think just articulating that I’m doing certain things for my emotional and physical well-being in this way will make them more meaningful to me.

In the meantime, I have five full days (plus two travel days) of self care and connection coming up, which I’ve paid for over the past two months with so much work at home and at school. I’m really looking forward to feeling a little more balanced after next week.

Over two months ago, BEFORE CHRISTMAS, I started decluttering, reorganizing and cleaning my house in preparation for my in-laws to stay with our kids. And this weekend, after cleaning the floors and bathroom downstairs, I finally feel done. Are there still drawers that need to be organized? Definitely. Are there still bags of junk to get ride of in the garage hallway? So many. But all the projects I set out to complete are now finished and I think the house is clean enough for my in-laws to stay. Their house is pristine – literally there is not a spec of dust in a corner of their garage – and now my house is clean enough that they will feel comfortable there for three days (even though there is still dust and lint in all corners of my garage).

This was a big project for us. Massive. The last time we cleaned our house like this was when we had AirBnB guests in the summer of 2018. Some areas of my house (under certain large pieces of furniture) haven’t been cleaned since then. Other areas have only been cleaned sporadically. But probably the biggest transformation has been the organizing. We Marie Kondo’ed the house years ago (maybe 2015?) and got rid of a lot of stuff, but the junk drawers that inspired me to declutter and reorganize this time existed back then. Some of them have been housing random stuff since we moved in almost 12 years ago.

It feels really good to be done with this project. And it feels really good to be in a house that is clean and tidy. The best part is feeling like maybe, just maybe this time we can keep it up. If we can, it would literally be the first time I’ve found a system for maintaining a tidy living space. I have never, in my 43 years, managed to do that consistently. It’s one of the main ways ADHD impacts my life.

Of course, I can’t know yet if I really will be able to maintain this new level of tidiness. I do know I put some new systems into place and that seems to be helping. I’m realizing I wrote a post about that in January and never posted it. I should finish that and put it up…

We need to head to the airport on Friday morning, after taking the kid to school, and there is still so much to do. Tuesday and Wednesday I plan to be at the dojo until late, so I really need to use my time wisely on Monday and Thursday. Oh, and I need to have sub plans ready for Friday too. It’s a lot, but with the 7th graders gone at school I think it’s doable.

I just wanted to check in after that super downer post last night to say I’m doing a lot better today. Last week was a little more than I could handle and by the end I was spiraling (as you could probably tell from my post).

But last night I cleaned up the laundry area and much of the rest of the garage. I also did a bunch of laundry and cleared and dusted most of the surfaces downstair. This morning I did my regular cleaning (shaking out rugs, sweeping and vacuuming) and laundry and also changed the kids’s sheets. I still have more to do, but it’s feeling manageable again.

I also arranged for my son to be with a friend yesterday (the kids had off for Lunar New Year) which means I don’t need to make sure my husband has protected work time tomorrow. I feel much more confident that I’ll be able to get everything done tomorrow. Or at least enough of it.

I also pulled out some clothes to pack! That was fun, and probably the first real prepping I’ve done for the actual trip, which start this coming Friday!

The real mood booster was running on the Great Highway today. It was sunny and almost felt warm for the first time in weeks. I took my kids and my son’s friend (the one he was with all yesterday), so being in the sun and exercising was also taking the kids out for some movement and saying thank you to my son’s friends parents for all the coverage on Friday. It felt like a real win.

Lest you think all I am doing all weekend is cleaning my house, I did watch an episode of Twin Peaks with my daughter, and then an episode of True Detective by myself (I’m watching season 3, because I can’t manage waiting for new episodes of things to come out these days). And right now I’m heading to watch a movie with people from the dojo. I’m bringing my furikake popcorn, which is always a crowd pleaser.

Sorry for all the negativity yesterday. Work had been hard and I’m not managing it super well with all I’m trying to do at home. But soon we’ll be on our trip and it will all feel worthwhile.

I was planning on doing a 5 Fives on Friday post this morning. On the way to work I had it all mapped out. Then I got to my classroom and it felt like a giant wave of tasks just crashed over me and threw me around all day until it was finally 3:10pm and I said “Hasta luego” to my final class.

I’ve kind of felt like that all week.

It’s been a lot. My husband hasn’t been sleeping great and he’s really struggling with low moods right now. All week I got home after incredibly long days and he would be a zombie on the couch until he shuffled off to bed at 10pm. Meanwhile I had to stay up until past midnight grading papers and getting stuff ready for the next day.

I’m also the official family Uber driver again because my daughter is able to go to swimming three times a week only if I take her two of those times. Most of the year she can only go once a week (they day her school gets out early), but during the high school swim season her practice gets pushed back. She really wants to commit to swimming right now, and I can’t deny her that so I’m driving an extra 1.5 hours twice a week now. Sigh.

Oh my god I am struggling to write this so badly right now. My brain is made of oatmeal. And I have so much to do. I’m facing down the last weekend before our trip and I feel like my to-do list just keeps getting longer, instead of smaller. Everywhere I look are spots I forgot about, and that need to be dealt with. I am SO OVER cleaning up my house. I feel like I never want to look at my house ever again.

This might be all I have in me right now. I promise things are not really that bad, I’m just so, so done. My brain is fried and my body is sore and I just need a drink tonight and a morning with some space to get some stuff done.

And luckily both of those things are in my future.

Happy Lunar New Year everyone!

{I must admit, I am starting to hit a wall on the house deep clean project. I’ve been working on it A LONG TIME. And it feels like I’m never going to be done. I get one area squared away and another needs work again. Or maybe I realize it was never really on my radar to begin with, but actually needs some attention. (::cough:: laundry area ::cough::).}

Today I made good progress. My husband and I cleaned the fridge. He took everything out, threw away anything we didn’t need anymore, and put it all back. I cleaned it. I don’t think it’s been cleaned like that since 2018, when we deep cleaned the house to prepare for AirBnB guests. I’ve definitely wiped it down a couple times since then, but I haven’t taken the shelves out to properly clean them in five and a half years. That feels like a long time. I’m curious how frequently you all deep clean your fridge. Is it a yearly project? Ours definitely needed it, badly. I am embarrassed by how dirty it was.

I also cleaned the downstairs kitchen. That was a massive undertaking. The downstairs kitchen was so, so gross. We don’t cook or anything in the downstairs kitchen – we only keep extra food there so we don’t have to go to the store so much – and I had let it get pretty dirty. It’s just so easy to walk in there, grab what I need, and walk out, willfully averting my gaze from all the scuff marks on the floor, stains on the counters, and junk piling in the corner. I honestly had no idea how disgusting the stove top was until I went to wipe it down. I don’t think it’s been used since 2022, when I had to boil our reusable respirator masks and hang them to dry.

Now that the kitchen is done, I’ll spend this week tidying the downstairs unit (our bedroom) so I can clean it properly next weekend. The floors especially need a good steam cleaning. Finally, the week before we leave I’ll clean our bathroom really well.

I also need to sweep and tidy the garage, especially over by the laundry area. (Seriously, how have I not noticed how bad this area is? Both machines are covered in lint!) If I know my mother-in-law, she’ll be doing laundry even if it’s not necessary. My kids always come back from sleeping at my in-laws’ house with their one set of clothes already washed. It’s kind of bizarre.

Thank goodness the cleaning person comes again the day we fly out. Speaking of which, I need to confirm that with her…

So yeah, it’s been a productive weekend. I wouldn’t say I’m starting this week well rested, but I did cross most of my most urgent tasks off my to-do list. I even made it through my first three hour training session at the dojo. It’s a really good set of classes, but it’s also exhausting. It starts with Sparring/Ground Fighting. which is physically exhausting, and then leads into High Belt, which is mentally intense, and finishes off with Forms, which requires memorizing difficult multi-step fighting forms. It’s just a lot. But it’s also a really good use of my time, training wise, so I’m glad I’m able to go three Saturdays this month.

Also, a shoe rack I ordered came and it fits perfectly and I was able to move the other shoe rack to a spot so it can still be used. It feels like suddenly we have WAY too many shoes, which means *I* have way too many shoes because everyone else in my family has a very reasonable amount of shoes.

My kids each have 3-4 pairs each. My husband has four pairs (black and brown work shoes, one pair of Vans and a pair of rain boots). Then I have enough pairs to fill an entire hang-over-the-door shoe organizer. I know I have too many, but I also know a lot of women have more than I do. I wonder how bigger families manage their shoes. Do they store shoes in each kids’ room? Is there a giant closet full of them? We have a door organizer (inside of entryway closet), a bench with two levels for shoes, a smaller shoe rack (with now holds my (multiple pairs of) Uggs. And a three level rack for the kids shoes on the landing of the stairs. So much shoe storage! How do you store shoes? I’m kind of dying to know.

Oh, and I’m stoked to have found a CAP dumbbell set on Craigslist because HOLY SHIT are dumbbells expensive. $35 for ONE 20lb dumbbell? What the what?! I have a rag-tag set of dumbbells, most of them from my parents, so I had no idea they started getting so expensive when they are heavier. I recently saw a set of them at Costco (six pairs, 5lb-30lbs on a rack) and balked at the $500 price tag, but now I guess I get it. Jeez. Anyway, I found a set you can put together to make 20lb-40lbs dumbbells each for $50 on Craiglist and I’m picking them up tomorrow. Yes please! Now I have all the dumbbells I’ll even need, and for less than the price of two 20 pounders.

The weather today was crazy, rain and high winds all afternoon. My son and I went to the mall to kill some hours and the power went out while we were in Target. It was a real trip. The weather hasn’t been so bad when we left, but by the time we got home the wind was howling. We stayed put the rest of the day. I hope our commutes are fine tomorrow.

Because tomorrow is another Monday. Another start to another week. I hope it goes by fast at least.