I’m going to be AWOL for a bit I think. There isn’t much time for writing here in St. Louis. The kids aren’t sleeping much and we’re all sharing a room. You know how these things go.
Of course it’s supposed to rain with thunderstorms for the entire five days we’re at “the farm,” where every fun activity involves being outside. I don’t mind the rain, as it will still be warm, but we can’t be out in it if there is lightening.
One of the reasons I haven’t been writing much is I’m just in a bummer place. Not even having a shot at getting that job really took me down. It’s taken a few days for me to get resigned enough about my schedule next year so that I don’t cry every time I think about it. I’m just so disappointed in myself, mired in regret, for not trying to get a new job this spring, for not trying to get a new job five years ago, for waiting so long I might never be able to take the pay cut and make the move.
But I still have a job, one that pays well and is secure (at least having some position within the district is secure, if not what I actually teach) and after watching my dad suffer six years of unemployed, I don’t take that for granted.
For now I’m trying to focus on our trip and seeing family. The weather may interfere with our plans, and we may be getting no sleep, but I do appreciate seeing my aunts, uncles and cousins.
At least there’s that.