Tomorrow (Tuesday) morning my kids and I head to the local (ridiculously expensive) lice-experts to get our heads checked. The checks are free (during a short two hour window that happens once a week), and they are starting to feel like an extremely important test we surely can’t pass.
The thing is, I want them to declare us lice-free so badly. I’ve spent the last five days living and breathing lice destruction and prevention. The last time we had lice I spent a fortune letting the experts fix it, because I didn’t know what I was doing and I had no sick days left to take. This time I’m attempting to do most of it on my own, but I don’t have a lot of confidence in my abilities. While I’ve identified a few bugs, I was only sure they were lice (and not lint or some other detritus) because they were moving in slow circles on the towel. I am never sure if I actually found a nit or if it’s just another piece of dandruff.
I’ve combed my daughter’s hair five times now. I thought she was bug and nit free for three and then tonight I found what looked a lot like two nits. At least.
I spent close to $300 getting de-loused myself but on Sunday I combed my own hair and found two bugs (their guarantee is voided if you don’t have the entire family checked and treated). Did they miss those nits? Did my kids pass more bugs along to me? Who the fuck knows…
I’ve been changing the beds and towels every time I do a comb-through. Treating every comb and brush after a single use (and each one is assigned to a family member–we’ve been doing that since our last lice rodeo). I’m using all the products I bought the last time; my entire house smells like Eucalyptus. I don’t know what else to do.
I hate feeling like I’m not capable, like I can’t fix something myself. I hate feeling like something is outside of my control, especially when that something is the ability to keep little bugs from crawling around in my hair.
I know that if they find bugs or nits tomorrow it won’t be the end of the world. We’ll just have to keep going, keep combing, keep washing, keep changing the beds and towels. I know that eventually we won’t have lice anymore… I just hope that I won’t have to spend a small fortune for the experts to make it happen. If I can’t manage this alone I’ll start living in fear of getting lice again, and if we’ve already had it twice in one year, I can’t imagine we’ll avoid it moving forward.
Please send us lice-free thoughts; if this isn’t over soon I fear I’ll lose my mind.
Have you ever dealt with lice? Any tips for this demoralized mother?